Je suis cool
by Odat
Summary: Drabble collection! KenKao. Three: The clown and the trapeze artist, who just happen to fall head over heels in love.
1. Je suis Cool

Kaoru sat in a dark room sprawled out on her sloppily made bed with a pair of sunglasses on looking out the wide open window at nothing in particular. Opened and half closed suitcases were on the floor and not yet bursting at the seems. Her laptop bag sat by the door half filled with the necessities. Another bag filled with the heavy books that would have tipped the scale far too early for the big bags was leaning against the opposite wall. She was wearing one of my over sized shirts, just coming to her mid thigh and with the first two buttons undone it had a dangerous plunge that hinted at which purple bra she was wearing.

She turned her head to me, the sunglasses hiding her eyes, and gave one of her classic smiles. I sighed and leaned against the door frame, a smile creeping onto my own face. "Je suis cool." Was all she said before she turned her head to look back out the window. I chuckled, only my girlfriend could say something like that, while looking like that, and get away with it.

I climbed over the end of her bed and lay my head down on her thighs; her hands were almost immediately in my bangs stroking them softly. Getting ready to go back to college was always an experience. I'd be getting my masters this year, two actually as it so happened, and she would be returning for her sophomore year as an undergrad. While we weren't at the same school they were close enough that we had been able to find an apartment in between the two that we could live in.

Kaoru was taking more language courses than I could count and acing them all. She had a knack for them and I teased her about her brain being a sponge. She would laugh at that and agree wholeheartedly. Having a linguistics major as a girlfriend made things rather interesting, on more than one occasion when I'd interrupted a study session she'd began to give me a piece of her mind in more than one language, and none that I understood. It was fairly frequent that she would respond to one of my questions in another language without realizing it. I'd laugh, poke her and ask for English please.

One of my favorite things though was to listen to her murmur to me at night after I'd woken in a cold sweat from a nightmare. She would sing lullabies under her breath and anything that I had been afraid off was gone. We would joke the next morning about it and she would tell me what she was really saying and other times she wouldn't because I already knew what she meant without words.

I had been in a naval academy when the war started; I was shipped off and given a sniper rifle that I handled until the war ended. I received and honorable discharge and with the money I had made was able to finish college and enroll in an international relations program. I'd like to try and stop wars before they happen now that I've been in one and had to take lives. I'm older that most of the other graduate students but no one gives me any crap about it, more because I don't look as old as I am and I look so feminine. While I tease Kaoru about her languages, she teases me about my hair.

"Kenshin ça va?" French is Kaoru's favorite and she's almost fluent, she claims she isn't but she's modest. Because of how often she uses it with me I've picked up the basics and I'm able to understand her, but I always respond in English.

"Fine, tired." As if that wasn't already conveyed in the fact that I was half asleep using her as a pillow. I snuggled into her a little closer wrapping my arms around her.

"J'ai peur." I snapped awake.

"What are you afraid of?" I looked up at her, there were tears sliding down from the sunglasses. Sitting up I took the sunglasses from her face. Kaoru's eyes are gorgeous, such a deep blue, but when she cries, I hate to admit it but, they're even more beautiful. The blue becomes almost black and they're so clear. I can't stand to watch her cry but more often than not she's crying because she's happy, I don't mind that so much and I don't feel guilty for thinking that her eyes are at their best with tears. "Kaoru?" These were not the happy tears that I like, she was distraught.

I should have known, she only steals my clothing without telling me when she's upset. Leaning in I whispered her name again almost against her lips but instead of telling me what's wrong she lunged forward with her arms around my neck sobbing into my chest. Her sudden movement and my already precarious position by the edge of the bed sent us both flat to the floor amid the suitcases, loose books and clothing. Kaoru barely seemed to notice as the air was knocked from my lungs; this upset me more than falling off the bed. What was so wrong that she wouldn't even notice the change of scenery?

I soothed my hands up and down her back, taking my time to work the kinks out of her shoulders and murmuring reassurances into her ear. She still didn't say anything. Her father was down the street at a friend's house and I had simply come over to hang out and help her pack. I started running through possible scenarios trying desperately to figure out what had her so upset but all sense left my head when she kissed me.

Normally I was the one to start things like this between us and Kaoru either cooperated or teased until I pinned her to the nearest solid object and ravished her. It was a game we played. For her to start a kiss was not unheard of but one this passionate blew my mind. My shirt was gone apparently as I felt her nails on my chest, and hers was completely unbuttoned. I didn't even have time to feel smug that I had guessed right on which purple bra she was wearing before it was gone as well.

I let her have complete control unsure that if I switched the tables it might set her off again. Or unleash a wrath that was rarely to be spoken of, I had seen it once when Sano forgot her birthday, Megumi was still giggling about it a week afterwards.

Kaoru had herself firmly planted on my hips straddling me as she lay across my chest to kiss and nip at my neck. I was left with little to do other than enjoy and run my hands up and down her sides worshipping her gentle curves and kneading her bottom. She however was not in the mood for foreplay. Women always claim that they're better at multitasking and right then I wasn't about to argue, for her to be able to undo my pants without looking and do that with her tongue at the same time! An involuntary hiss escaped my lips when she reached down and stroked me.

Pushing her panties to the side I gripped at her hips as she slowly slid herself down onto me, finally when she reached the base I threw my head back and groaned. Her hands curled into fists on my chest as she moaned my name. She lifted herself a few inches before dropping back down, spots dancing before my eyes with each movement she made. Well this certainly was new and very pleasant. Holding her hips a little tighter I helped her move in the rhythm we found. It was fast and hard and I couldn't help but meet her half way each time. As we reached our peaks the dots I had been seeing became blinding. I called her name as every muscle became tense and a silent scream raked her body before she collapsed to my chest.

As our hearts slowed and out breathing settles I held her close to me enjoying the scent of her hair and our sex. I lay butterfly kisses against her neck feeling her pulse flutter when I licked at the hollow of her throat. In respond Kaoru buried her nose deeper into my neck and her hands became even more tangled in my hair.

"A penny for your thoughts?" I asked quietly, I didn't want to ruin the moment but I was still worried as to why she had been crying and what brought this on. I mused as much to her and she began to giggle.

She propped herself up on her elbows on my chest, not entirely comfortable for me but she looked cute enough that I'd let it slide. "You know," she began, "I don't really remember." She looked out the window again as my mouth dropped open. She turned back to me and smiled. "Close your mouth darling you're catching flies." I promptly closed my mouth with an audible snap.

"PMS, it's a terrible thing." She nodded to herself, sat up and raised her arms above her head to stretch. It gave me a wonderful view of her breasts from below as her back cracked. "That it is." She tweaked my nose and made to move off of me. I was having none of it.

With firm hands around her waist I managed to growl out her name before rolling her so I was on top now. She was surprised about the turn of events and the little 'oh' of her mouth said as much. She must have caught the glint in my eye as she began to wiggle her way out from under me. I groaned and dropped a little more of my weight onto her letting her feel that her wiggling was having quite the opposite effect of what she wanted. She began to protest verbally as I kissed her collarbones and downward.

"Now Kenshin we just did this! No! Stop that! No, don't you do that, you know I can't stand—" Her own strangled moan cut her off. I smirked against the side of her breast. "Good grief you're awful." She ran a hand through her hair.

I chuckled against her throat before finding her lips. After another mind blowing kiss I managed to find enough of my voice to whisper against her lips "oh no dear, I think you'll find that I am very very good." The only response I got was a deep moan.


	2. Dark Room

AN: Ok, well, I've decided to make this my drabble collection site for my KenKao works. "I Remember" will remain by itself, as I think it should. This hit me right after watching a video that simulated what being a schizophrenic is like. Don't ask, it just happened. I love you guys and enjoy!

Kaoru sat in a chair in the middle of the room. The chair was simple and comfortable, she sat in it every day only ever getting up to make more tea after the last mug she'd made had gone cold. She kept the curtains drawn, darkness was easier to deal with then the light. If there was light, then she could see the ghosts walking around her. It was bad enough that she could hear them, but it was worse to see them. Kaoru had decided years ago that she would die in her sleep, because that way, as a ghost, she would look like herself. If you died messily, you were a messy ghost. Messy ghosts hung around more than clean ghosts too, usually because they had so many broken hopes and anger that they had no way to vent.

Until they found Kaoru sitting in her chair, they found that they could vent to her, and if they let out all of their anger they could move on. At first, she didn't mind letting them yell and scream at her, insulting her like she was the one who betrayed them or hurt them. She didn't mind because it helped them, she thought of herself as a ghost therapist; maybe one day she'd get her own television show. But it wasn't just a few ghosts, it was a lot of ghosts, and after a while she began to believe them. Their words became harder and harder to shrug off, because so many of them said the same things to her. She tried to put it up to all of them having the same feelings, but the wording would even be the same, there are only so many ways to say hurtful things. And so Kaoru began to believe them.

She would sit in her chair and just listen to them, the cruel words, the sobs and regrets of lives gone. Ghosts traveled from all over the world to see her, there were languages spoken that she'd never heard of, sometimes there were even dead languages that filled her ears. But she always understood what they were saying. She always felt their hatred and remorse for their deaths.

She had one man with shocking white hair, he was cruel and spiteful he spoke of his sister and a red haired demon that he should have been able to kill. He spoke to her like she was the red haired demon that he hated so much. His words cut into her more than usual, the mug of tea that she always kept firmly clasped between both hands began to tremble after the second day with him. He was with her for a week, longer than any of the other ghosts she had ever dealt with. Finally though, of the seventh day, his anger left him and he spoke gently of his sister smiling for him.

Kaoru smiled bitterly as he left, he brother wouldn't smile for her anymore, he was dead, but he hadn't even come back as a ghost. Her whole family had died in their home, Kaoru should have died, her wounds had been dreadful, but she had pulled through. It was when she returned home as an orphaned eighteen year old that the ghosts appeared to her. Along with helping them, she waited for her family to visit. But they never did and any ghost that she ever asked about them never answered her. They would simply focus on their own death and anger.

Two days after the white haired man left, a gentle and serene woman walked into Kaoru's dark room. Her voice was soft, but she couldn't hide the hatred and the regret of her death. She had died messily, a sword through her gut, the blood stained kimono was terrifying. She'd left her little brother, fallen in love with the red haired demon when she was supposed to kill him, and then died in his place protecting him while he killed her. Kaoru shivered horribly for the whole three days that the gentle woman spoke to her. She was so bitter and exhausted that Kaoru could hardly believe that she never raised her voice. Only when she left did Kaoru stop shaking.

Ghosts could roam the land for any period of time before they left. Kaoru had listened to ghosts from all eras. They simply wandered before finding her or some other medium that would allow them to move on.

A month after the gentle woman left, a red haired samurai appeared sitting in the corner of Kaoru's dark room. He didn't say anything for the first three days. He never even lifted his head to look at her. No other ghosts came to her while he sat in her room; it was a wonderful break to Kaoru. She was tired and the silence was comforting. His presence was even comforting. She took her time to study him; he had died slowly, from the inside out she mused. His heart had gone first, and then his mind, and finally his body had given out on him. She could read him more clearly than other ghosts, he was ashamed and broken. There was no anger in him; he thought he deserved his death. For the first time in many years, Kaoru felt the need to help this ghost; she wanted him to move on peacefully, to rest.

On the forth day, Kaoru left her chair and sat beside the red haired ghost in the corner of her room. He spoke first, his voice gravely from not being used and sad, his voice was very sad but calm. "Why do you stay here?" He asked her.

"Because there is nothing left for me out there. Why are you here?"

"Then why don't you move on?"

"I can't, I have no family, nothing to really live for. You didn't answer my question."

He looked at her, surprise clearly written on his face, and then realization. "I can't move on, because I don't deserve to. I have killed too many, I am not worthy of peace."

Kaoru snorted, "Of course you deserve peace, all ghosts do. Talk to me, I can help."

"But you can't even help yourself." Kaoru looked at him. "When did you die?" He asked her. Kaoru laughed at him.

"I'm not dead, I just sit here and listen to the ghosts who need to let go of their anger. It helps them to move on after some one has listened to them." But then it struck her; her family's murder, the terrible wounds she'd suffered, then suddenly, being ok, finding herself at home in the dark room. No one had come to see her or check on her, she had never eaten anything of drank the tea she always made. "I'm dead." Was all she said before the tears came slipping out of her eyes. She was a ghost too.

The red haired man just nodded, and then pulled her into a hug against him. He felt warm and strong, all of the other ghosts who had brushed up against her had been cold and misty, and they had always gone through her. But he was holding her like they were both still alive, like they were both really there. When she gripped at his shirt and her tears hit his chest, it seemed to sink in for him as well that he was really holding her. They pulled apart for a moment to look at each other; his eyes were a strange violet with flecks of gold. Hers were a deep blue that was almost black in the dark room.

"Kenshin." She whispered before he hugged her fiercely, he had never told her his name but she knew everything about him and Kaoru knew that he knew everything about her too.

"I've been wandering all this time looking for you." He whispered into her ear, his breath hot, "I never even knew." She'd been waiting for him to find her, never even knowing that she had died. "I don't deserve this, but I cannot deny it. We were meant to be together, and in the next life, I will find you Kaoru." She could feel his promise wrap around her like a security blanket. She'd look for him in the next life, and something told her as he kissed her, that it wouldn't take a very long time before they found each other again. They faded from the dark room together as the sun rose outside.


	3. Circus

AN: Soooo this is random. Circus!Kenshin and Kaoru. Can't you just see Kenshin being a clown tripping all over himself and being silly? I can!

He loved to watch her fly through the air, she'd been picked up by the circus troop after they'd found her trying to sneak into a show by herself. She explained that her father had promised to take her, but had died recently, so she decided to go by herself. They had adopted her into giving her meaning and work as a trapeze artist.

And an artist she was. Graceful and small she could fly like no one else, it was like she'd been born to be in the air. He would watch as he was juggling, it was a good exercise in multi tasking for him. Her partner, Sano, a lean man who doubled as their strong man act would catch her and hold her before she jumped. He was jealous of Sano, he was a simple just clown and stayed far below the top of the canopy.

Yahiko threw him another ball to juggle. He'd been with the circus for years, it was a good way to disappear and when he put on his make up painting a grin on his face he almost felt happy again. He'd watched Kaoru grow up from the teenager to the woman who flew and amazed. At first he'd kept his distance, he didn't want any attachments in case he needed to make a hasty retreat, but she found him any way. She was always nice to him, polite and cheerful, it made his day when she sat next to him during meals. Though that was rare. He didn't mind sitting by himself, the crackle of the fire was comfort enough. He was kind of the odd clown out.

Kenshin began to throw the balls back to Yahiko who began to juggle as well, soon they were going through their newest routine. Kenshin launched his up into the air at the exact moment that Yahiko did, they both dove and somersaulted to switch places, Kenshin managed to catch all of the balls that Yahiko had thrown, but Yahiko missed a few of Kenshin's. Kenshin was helping the boy collect his when he heard a giggle from high in the maze of wires. When he looked up Kaoru was sitting on the tight rope walker's rope in the middle; just sitting there peacefully, completely at ease on the taunt rope. Megumi had been teaching her, but Kenshin still worried about her.

She put her hand over her mouth realizing she'd been caught. Kaoru giggled again, and then bristled when Yahiko decided to pick a fight with her. Kenshin sighed, they were like siblings, and the bickered like them too. Kaoru stood up on the rope and Kenshin's senses came alive. He watched the rope begin to sway, Kaoru powerful legs trying to keep her balanced, her position shifted, her eyes widened and she lost her grip. Kenshin leapt before he could think, there was no safety net to catch her, and she'd die if she hit the hard dirt floor.

He heard her gasp when he wrapped his arms around her, Kenshin flipped in the air and landed on his feet in a crouched position before letting his legs collapse beneath him and falling onto the ground with Kaoru safely tucked under his chin.

Aoshi, their daring dagger thrower and ring leader and his flexible and overly energetic assistant Miaso ran from their practicing area to the clown and the trapeze artist. Aoshi sent his wife to get Megumi, the resident doctor and tight rope walker, he had a feeling she wouldn't be needed, both Kenshin and Kaoru seemed fine. But Megumi would want proof that they were finally together, she was going to win the bet anyway.

Once Megumi was able to convince Kenshin to let go of the girl and deemed them both just fine, the small crowd left to go see who had officially won the bet of "When the two love birds would finally get together." Kenshin was left with a very embarrassed girl, she was more upset that she had fallen than that she had almost died. He offered a small smile, hoping to make her feel better. Kaoru sighed and leaned into him trying to hide her face in the sleeve of his over sized shirt. He'd been surprised, but smiled a real smile and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. He didn't even need his painted grin to be happy anymore.

Aoshi was announcing the clowns' act, Kenshin took a deep breath getting ready to put on a wide smile and begin juggling. He fell right into character until a beautiful woman in a tight and water colored leotard rushed up and grabbed his face in between her hands kissing him. He'd dropped the bowling pins he was supposed to start juggling at that moment and wrapped his arms around her waist pulling her to him. They broke apart, and Kenshin picked her up and spun her around laughing. The curtains opened, but instead of freezing, Kaoru jumped onto Kenshin's shoulders and they walked out together with the other clowns. She would jump down, do back flips and entertain, getting the crowd clapping to the music and then run back to Kenshin to give him a dramatic kiss on the cheek. It became a normal part of the routine. As she would fly through the air during her trapeze act, he would try to chase her, back and forth, tripping and somersaulting, trying to give her a rose. Head over heels in love they called it.


End file.
